One day a man was walking with his donkey when they happened upon an empty well, many feet deep. The donkey fell into the bottom of the well, but the man, distressed as he was, could do nothing. The donkey brayed and cried for help, but he had no way to help his beloved donkey out of the well. Tears streaming down the man's face, he slowly began shoveling dirt into the well to put the donkey out of his misery. Eventually the donkey's cries ended, and the deed was done. The man was brokenhearted. He was then surprised to feel a soft nudge against his back. He turned and there was his donkey! He realized that, little by little, the donkey had climbed his way out of the well as the man had poured dirt in. With shovelful, the donkey took a step until it could climb out on its own. The man rejoiced and hugged his donkey around its neck.
A friend shared this story with me after we had long talked of depression and suicide. It's so heartbreaking to think that someone's heart can be so utterly empty that they feel unable to cope, but it happens all too often. I have been at the bottom of that pit, and it is a place of desperation. There have been times when all I wanted was a bit of hope and I found none. Instead, my heart and soul cried out as the donkey did. I had no way to pull myself out. Many have been in that place and taken their own lives because of this realization that there is nothing they can do.
I like to think that is when God sends in reinforcements -- shovelfuls of dirt. Or, in my opinion, doses of hope (see here). When we are at the bottom of the well, it is harder to see the help. It often looks like little more than dirt. Somehow, God is able to use those little bits, and even the smallest hope can keep us from staying where we're at.
The Little Things Are Often the Biggest
When we are in the thick of hard times, our vision is so easily clouded. Getting out (or just staying afloat) requires a focus on what really matters:
Remember those who care and desire to help, even when their help isn't perfect.
Spend time around people who will lift you up.
Read the Psalms, a book of honest struggle from people who were just as human as we are.
Pray. Pray. Pray. I personally find that it is so difficult to talk to God when I am struggling, but He is the one who knows the depths of my heart better than anyone else could.
Be thankful for what you have, even when it doesn't seem like much.
Tell someone that you are struggling. I beg you not to suffer alone. See a counselor and ask a friend for help. It's probably the hardest part of dealing with depression, but it is so important.
Never Give Up
I know how it feels to want the pain to just stop. I have been so low that when I have a spare moment to sit by myself, I close my eyes and soak in the silence and wish that I could simply stop existing. Satan is so skilled in his ability to wear us down that it is not unbelievable that a person would take their own life because of his whisperings. His voice becomes like a built-in speakerphone within our minds; it feels like it's on 24/7, never ceasing.
On the other hand, we have a God who is also never ceasing. His power is greater, his love is stronger, and his words are truer, and he can give us that one little shovelful that we need, that one dose of hope. There will be times when we are overflowing and times when we are consistently at the bottom with that one last bit. I urge you to press on, however hard it may be. It isn't over yet.
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