Dogma

Sometimes my husband and I have these one-sided conversations where he just sits there with his eyes shut and I talk. It's a little frustrating, but I'm more of a talker than he is so I've learned not to mind it much!

Today we had one such conversation as a follow-up to something we'd briefly discussed earlier. I'm writing a research paper that is very challenging to me personally as I basically evaluate everything I've ever been taught about doctrine. It's going to be a doozy! So while I am researching, I mention to my husband that I may not know exactly what I believe yet because I haven't researched it fully in the Bible, but I have an idea of what I think I believe (weird, I know, but it does the job for now!). He proceeded to ask me what I believed and we got into a small tiff about it, ending with us deciding not to argue because it wasn't worthwhile in the moment.

I was glad my husband made that choice to set it aside for the time being, but my feathers were ruffled. I was trying to think of ways to bring it up and was determined to find proof for what I'd said in the Bible. It was foolish, childish, and mean-spirited. Luckily, I had the chance to think for a moment about what I was doing. My motives were not good. I wanted to teach him a lesson. But how is that at all Christ-like?

Later when we were having our one-sided conversation, I was telling my husband that I want to become less dogmatic about my beliefs. I remember my home church mentioning that they had "closed-hand" beliefs and "open-hand" beliefs. Things that would sit within a closed hand would be considered totally essential. Open hand beliefs are, generally, things non-essential for salvation or a Christian life. I'm not going to get into it now, but I was reminded of this idea of open and closed-handed beliefs, and I realized that most of my beliefs rest within my tightly closed hand. I am not angered to the point of arguing when someone disagrees with my personal beliefs, but I do become rather judgmental. 

I am learning that, especially for the sake of unity and evangelism, it is so important for the Church to be open-handed about things that aren't essentials. I know that all this has been said before, but I wish it were actually done more, especially by me. I long to see the Church worshipping as one unit, rather than many factions. I am so glad that God is the one who decides, and I have complete confidence that this longing will be fulfilled one glorious day!

Faith Like...Mice?!

A couple of weeks ago my husband and I bought two small mice as pets. We both wanted something to love and care for, but couldn’t quite commit to a dog or a cat. They were cheap, cute, and the store had tons of them! Since we bought them, Benji and Rosemary, both girls, have reminded me so much about I relate to God, and how I want to relate to God.

Benji is a small, thin, black mouse. She runs on the wheel often, an only eats what is necessary. Rosemary, a chubby white mouse, eats whenever she is awake. Though it might seem as if Benji is already on my good side for being so fit and taking such good care of herself (she also takes good care of Rosemary, acting as the older sister figure while Rose sleeps), she also is very jumpy and still has yet to sit willingly in my hand. She has moved from only sniffing from afar for a quick second to leaning onto my hand with her front paws while her back paws are as far away from my hand as possible to crawling fully but briefly onto my hand if it is very still and very low to the ground. Though she doesn’t usually seem frightened, she does clearly lack confidence in me and treats my husband the same way.

Rosemary, the borderline glutton, is the relational mouse. She loves to sleep close to her sister, and excitedly crawls into my palm as soon as she notices it (mice are mostly blind, you know). She is the one who will likely fall asleep in my hand because she is so content to just BE with me. She will sit and sniff and crawl and sleep – my hand is her favorite place to be. It is wonderful and fills me with so much joy whenever she is near me. Though Benji is not quite as trusting yet, every step she takes in that direction also brings me joy! I love for my mice to be near me.

I think this is good depiction of how God feels about us. We are so nervous and awkward about talking to Him and being in His presence, but He enjoys us! Like Benji, we lack the confidence and are overly cautious when there is no reason at all to question our safety or His motives. He longs for us to be like Rosemary, sitting with Him, “squeaking” with delight and being content! He loves it when we get braver but is saddened when we move away in distrust. And He rejoices when we come near!

Sadly I am so much like Benji. I feel uncomfortable in my Father’s presence, unsure what to do or say, just ready to be done as soon as possible. How much His heart must break when we treat Him that way! I pray I will learn to trust Him more, learn to love Him more. That I am become so content in His presence I could just live in His hands. I’m not quite there, but I can pray and strive. And He will never love me less for my imperfections, but only love me more.

Because God Is Love

There has been a lot of talk about Miley Cyrus, so I thought I'd join in! Let's be honest: we've all heard the newest singles, seen the shocking videos, and laughed at the memes. So many cruel comments have been made about Miley, and though I agree that she is going down a path that will only lead to more pain for her, I don't think anyone has the right to share their hateful opinions. One Youtube user had this to say:

I admit that I have laughed at the jokes and been ashamed of her behavior. Yet it is clear that she is just another young woman who is hurting and broken. What gives us the right to call her names and be disgusted? Is her sin any worse than ours? God does see her in all her brokenness and humility and says: BEAUTIFUL. WORTHWHILE. REDEEMABLE. ENOUGH TO DIE FOR. No matter what decisions she is making, she is worth it to Him, just like the rest of us. Let's start acting Christ-like. Who knows how many people we are turning away from Jesus when they see our disdain for Miley's behavior? We don't have to approve, but we do have to love. And it really isn't about Miley at all. I mean, most of us don't actually know her, but how many of us know people like her? Yet if we can't bring ourselves to stop judging her long enough to love those around us, we are keeping ourselves from becoming more like Christ, and that is our goal, is it not? 

I know that this isn't my most eloquent post, but this is what's on my heart. As a last note, there is a moment in Miley's new video when she looks as if she is going to cry. I don't recommend watching the video, as it really is rather inappropriate, but I took a screenshot for reference.

She may be famous, but she's only human. 

"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us."
1 John 4:7-12